Welcome to week #17 of the #YoungMumsProject. This week we are joined by my lovely friend Tamara talking about her experiences as a young mum of one little girl.
Q1. Can you describe your personal experience of life as a young mum?
Rewarding, oh so rewarding! Being a mother is rewarding at any age but when you are a young
mother where strangers have an opinion on you before they have even taken the time to get to know
you, it makes it all the more rewarding when you can show them that you’re trying your best and you
aren’t ‘dropping your child off to go out drinking every weekend’.
Q2. How did you feel when you found out you were pregnant?
I had mixed emotions. I was 16 and I had prayed that what I had just gone through would be over now
but then I sat down in the bathroom and pregnant showed up. I was scared because it really is a big
thing, its not like choosing what meal you want at a restaurant it is massive but my family said that
they would support me and the fear soon turned to excitement.
Q3. Do you feel like life has been harder because you had children at a young age?
Life has been a little harder of course it has, I had only left school a couple of months prior to having
that positive but I couldn’t imagine my life without little one now. There has been moments where I
wanted to give up because things were difficult, I can’t remember the last time I had a good night’s
sleep and that’s not just down to little one throwing all nighters it’s also down to me worrying about her
when she does have a good night’s sleep (what’s that all about?) But one smile from Shaniah and
even the hardest of days become a breeze.
Q4. Did you ever feel judged by anyone? If so, how did you deal with it?
Oh god yeah! All the time I think it comes hand in hand with being a young mum but it really shouldn’t.
At first it used to bother me big time but now I have learnt to take it with a pinch of salt. I live every day
being the best parent I can be for Shaniah and take comfort in the fact that im proving all those that
judged me wrong.
Q5. Do you think there are any advantages to being a younger mum?
I’ve always said that being a young mum makes parenting more fun as you can relate to the little one
more, Shaniah and I have an unbreakable bond. Don’t get me wrong my mother and I have a good
bond but I feel Shaniah and I have a much stronger bond whether or not that’s down to being a
younger parent or not I am not sure but I’d like to think so!
Q6. What are the best and worst things about being a young mum?
The best thing about being a young mum is how we get to spend more of our years together and that
is pretty special.
The worst thing about being a young mum is the sheer negativity from strangers, being a mother is
hard for anybody especially those that are young and I feel that instead of being a negative nelly we
should all be behind the parents and show them that we are here for them and that they are doing a
Q7. How do you think we can challenge the stigma that surrounds young mums?
There’s always going to be stigma surrounding young parents simply because in life someone always
needs something to rant about and it just so happens that young mums tend to be the brunt of it, the
best thing we can do is simply stick together and show them that their views are wrong. I feel those
that blog are helping big time.
Q8. What are the main issues that young mums have to deal with, and how do you think they could be better supported?
I feel the main issue is how we aren’t trusted, many young parents go to the doctors with concerns
then get palmed off simply because they think that we are too young to know whether something is
wrong with our own babies. Yes we are young but we aren’t naive. I feel that our age should be
overlooked and we should just be seen as a mother like everyone else.
Q9. Do you think that the support for young mums has improved over time?
I definitely feel as though the support for us is getting better albeit a little slow but it is and I feel that in
about 10 years time age will be just a number and we will be seen as ordinary parents who love our
children to bits, yes we were young but we love them all the same.
Q10. If you were approached by a young mum asking for advice, what advice would you give them and why?
If a young mother approached me I would tell them to do what they feel is best, don’t worry about
what others think about you or what you do you’re the parent and you know what is best for your
baby. You will lose friends along the way but you will gain mummy friends who know exactly how you
are feeling and they truly get your little rants, they don’t mind if you look like death because they feel it
If you want to know more about Tamara and her family, you can find her here.
If you would like to get involved with the #YoungMumsProject and write a Guest Post for us please contact me: firstname.lastname@example.org
You can read more posts from the #YoungMumsProject here.