Welcome back to the #YoungMumsProject, this week we are joined by the lovely Georgianne.
My name is Georgianne, I am Mama of Alba Tiger-Lily Morgan, I am partner of Max and Step-Mama to Louie. I am 23 years old and in every sense of the word a typical Virgo. I’m a self-confessed and slightly obsessed Harry Potter fan and absolute f•r•i•e•n•d•s fanatic. I’m one of 8 children from a very unconventional family but one full of love nevertheless. I’m an anxiety warrior and depression survivor. I’m a spiritualist and conspiracy theorist. Nice to meet you.
Q1. Can you describe your personal experience of life as a young mum?
My baby girl saved me. She saved me in all ways a person can be saved (That may or may not sound similar to a quote heard in movie about a giant unsinkable ship hitting an iceberg). Nevertheless, I mean it, she is so incredibly wonderful and I have already changed entirely as a person in the short 9 weeks that she has been here. She’s teaching me patience which has always been one of my worst downfalls, I’ve always been so impatient with everything and anything. Pregnancy itself is a 9 month stretch of patience and in my case I was dished an extra 2 weeks on top! I never ever knew I could love someone the way I do her, I’ve been flooded with all the natural instincts that I’ve witnessed in others but never felt myself before. It’s a different kind of love. Totally unconditional. After my only eldest brother was murdered in 2007 at just 27 years old, I had to learn the hard way how short and precious life is, he didn’t get his chance to have a baby yet, I vowed to myself I’d live my life to the full for my sake and his memory. I hope he’s proud, I wish he could have met her. All I ever wanted was to become a mum, it’s everything and more than I could have ever wanted! It’s hard – DO NOT GET ME WRONG, but it’s worth every single millisecond, believe me.
Q2. How did you feel when you found out you were pregnant?
I was over the moon to be pregnant, sadly we lost our first baby due to an early miscarriage which tore our hearts apart. Having something so intricately perfect and then having it snatched away is such a cruel part of life. You imagine your whole life away as a mother, what school they’ll attend, what their laugh will sound like and how they’re face will look but then in an instant it’s taken away, for me it took me 4 days to lose the baby from start to finish. We were crushed. We vowed we would try again as soon as physically possible, and that we did. Figuring out ovulation tests was confusing to say the least but we smashed it. I couldn’t even wait until I was due my period to take a test, I took it 3 days before I was due and there in front of me was the faintest but most beautiful little line I ever did see. Our rainbow baby. I was so anxious throughout the entire pregnancy as I’ve suffered with anxiety severely since a young teenager, I was petrified I’d lose her but we got here in the end. She’s the epitome of perfection.
Q3. Do you feel like life has been harder because you had children at a young age?
I think having children can be hard at any age in all honesty, you still get sleepless nights and those moments when you have no clue how to stop your perfect little baby from crying resulting in feeling like a complete failure. I’ve had some extremely difficult moments in my life, but I’m pleased to say that becoming a mama has been such an exciting adventure which yes of course has it’s stressful blips but primarily speaking is a m a z i n g.
Q4. Did you ever feel judged by anyone? If so, how did you deal with it?
I have at times felt fairly judged as I fell pregnant very soon after my relationship began, that pregnancy sadly ended in a miscarriage as I previously mentioned however losing that baby made us stronger than I even thought possible and confirmed how we felt about becoming parents to the same little human as well as how we truly felt about each other. We knew it was right, we knew it was what we both truly wanted, we both experienced moments in life that made us learn the hard way how short and precious life actually is so it was only the opinion of my
amazing partner that mattered to me. Both of our families were so happy and supportive for us too so we didn’t even entertain anybody else’s thoughts or feelings towards our news. Some couples wait years to try for a baby and I’ve often seen a relationship fall apart when the struggle of becoming a new parent kicks in, so time in my eyes was irrelevant, and luckily for us we are even better together than I believe we ever could have been!
Q5. Do you think there are any advantages to being a younger mum?
I love the idea of still being fairly young when our child becomes an adult themselves. I always feared being that ‘fuddy-duddy’ mum that weren’t with the times of young people at all. I want to share secrets with my girl when she’s old enough to collect them and be a best friend aswell as a mummy, that’s not at all to say that older mum’s can’t have the same relationship as that with their children but it’s just a personal preference for me.
Q6. What are the best and worst things about being a young mum?
Having more time to spend with your children over the span of your lifetime is definitely the best thing for me. Knowing your baby for that little bit longer before you both grow really old is a major plus. I would say the worst thing is that in this day and age, being able to find affordable housing and living is so unbelievably difficult. I believe we don’t have much of a chance anymore to get on our feet without getting ourselves in debt to do it, that’s very sad. It’s so hard to spread our wings and flee the nest nowadays however I weren’t going to let that stop me from starting a family, I don’t believe In there ever being a ‘right’ time to start a family, I believe if you waited to have ‘enough’ money for a baby than it would probably never ever happen for you. Nobody can prepare you for the cost of living and raising a baby.
Q7. How do you think we can challenge the stigma that surrounds young mums?
I think all we can do is keep doing what we are already doing, and that is smashing mamahood! I know of some middle aged mothers that are unable to cope as well as some young mothers that I know. Age really is just a number. Use the support around you that is available and keep showing the world how strong you really are even when you don’t feel it. Life has to evolve and all this age malarkey is silly, a woman is capable of being a good mother at any age. Natural instincts take over for most women and that’s great.
Q8. What are the main issues that young mums have to deal with, and how do you think they could be better supported?
I think young mums are often looked upon negatively, I hate the ‘kids having kids’ phrase. When I look back to when my nan was young, it was so common for women to be married and pregnant at a young age such as 16 years old so I feel their era are often more understanding than the generation above us in all honesty. I think it’s a matter of seeking support available to you and taking up the offer of support groups and also find other mama’s that are perhaps similar ages to help you feel less alone as motherhood can often be a lonely experience even for women that are in partnerships, I feel it’s a natural emotion of becoming a mum.
Q9. Do you think that the support for young mums has improved over time?
I think it has improved but there is still some poor attitudes in the industry and in everyday life from some older people which needs to be stamped out. I think the overall young mum image has improved a lot though, there are a lot more understanding and less judgemental people now thankfully due to more information and training being provided for healthcare professionals when dealing with young mum’s. Women especially should empower other woman at any age rather than putting them down especially through the transition from woman to mother.
Q10. If you were approached by a young mum asking for advice, what advice would you give them and why?
I would say, just listen to yourself, listen to your thoughts and feelings always and try and find that balance within your own body, mind and spirit. Seek advice when you feel unsure about something rather than sitting and worrying about things like I often have in the past. Don’t let any other human make you feel less of a person because you’ve chosen to become a mama sooner than society would have usually desired. It’s your life and your choice always and motherhood is so special, who is anyone to say when it’s the right time to do it. Love is love above all. Love knows no boundaries, especially a mothers love.
Until next time,
If you would like to read more about Georgianne and her family, you can find her here.
You can also find her on Twitter and Instagram.