I’m sat here wanting to write “lets break the stereotype” because to me, I am not a stereotype. But for all you know, I could be that stereotype. I could be in denial, after all I did grow up in a council house and I did drop out of college to have a baby so to a stranger, I probably am that stereotype aren’t I, but those few details don’t even scratch the surface on who I am or what I do on a daily basis so I want to tell you all a little bit about my story and you can decide for yourself. Sound good?
So, I was 16 years old living at my boyfriends after a bit of a bust up with my parents (I wasn’t the best daughter, I’ll be honest). I was struggling in my last year at secondary school and ended up dropping half my subjects to then become a “part timer” spending the majority of my time hidden away in a room where I could do my coursework on my own, trying my absolute best to avoid as many people as possible. I’m not sure what happened to me, it all seems a bit of a blur but in 2014 I had a breakdown. I was depressed and absolutely crippled with anxiety to the point where I couldn’t even leave the house. I completed just a handful of my exams in a room on my own and did well… okay, I guess. I didn’t get A*’s or even do half as well as what my brother did but I completed my exams and to me that was enough. After nearly 2 years of hardly seeing my school friends, I plucked up the courage and said I would attend the school leaving ceremony to then find out just a week before that I was pregnant. Great, what the hell do I do now? 16 and pregnant.. pretty stereotypical in itself right? I panicked, a lot.
I think my first thought was ‘Oh sh*t, what am I going to do? I’m going to have to withdrawal all of my college applications.. How am I going to tell my mum? How are we going to tell your mum? How am I going to be a mum? I can’t even keep my bedroom tidy.. ‘ kinda thing. I was 8 weeks pregnant when we told both of our parents and despite it being a ‘It’s okay, we will support you’ kind of situation, it soon hit home and we were kicked out. I told my mum via text message (really not the best way to tell someone you’re pregnant) and thankfully she stuck by me the whole time, letting me and my boyfriend move in with her until we found a place of our own. We had both just turned 17, Rob was working in an apprenticeship saving back as much money as he could whilst I was on the hunt for a place to live, learning to drive and trying to budget buy all of the baby stuff with a lot of help from my mum. By the time we had found a place that was affordable and ideal for us, I was 8 months pregnant.
We moved out into our own 2 bed flat leaving my mum in peace, she was so supportive throughout the whole pregnancy, the house move, everything and even more so when our beautiful baby girl was born in February 2016. Despite being a young parent I absolutely loved it. For the first year of Alyssia’s life Rob was at work/college full time and the only time we really saw him was at weekends. In July when Alyssia was 5 months old, I passed my driving test and started taking Rob to work 3 days a week and then picking him up in the evenings, I would spend all day at home with Alyssia, cleaning, tidying, going to baby groups etc and was on the go constantly. I was never really asked about going back to work until Alyssia turned 1 and then I started to feel the pressure. Rob actually quit his job due to stress etc and is now a self employed window cleaner. I started my blog in March 2017 and decided to make it my job. In August 2017 I went self employed as a blogger and am loving every minute of it.
Fast forward 3 years from finding out we were first pregnant with our daughter and being kicked out.. to now, we are doing it all over again. Alyssia will become a big sister in September 2018 and we will become a happy little family of four. Alyssia will be 2 and a half when the baby is born and I honestly cannot wait. Motherhood hasn’t been easy, I’ll be honest but is it plain sailing for anybody? Regardless of my age, I am still a mum.. a young mum yes but still a mum just like all of the others. Everyone is entitled to their own opinions by all means but I don’t think I’ve done that badly.. college was never my thing anyway. Don’t judge somebody by the small details, read their story first..