I have started a new Guest Post Series for young mums who have had children before the age of 25, it is called #YoungMumsProject. I started this project after realising how many young mums feel lonely and isolated at times, I am hoping that having different mum’s contribute to the series will help others realise that we are all in this ‘Mum Club’ together and that no matter what you are going through, you are not alone.
We are kicking of the series with a post written by Becca from My Girls and Me.
Hi, I’m Becca from mygirlsandmesite.com and I am an 18 year old mummy blogger. I have two children. Rosie who is 4 and Miyah who is 3 and a half months. I am engaged to my amazing fiancé Michael.
Q1. Can you describe your personal experience of life as a young mum?
It was hard, extremely hard. I had hate thrown at me from all directions. I got stopped in the streets and people wrote evil things about me and my unborn child on social media. I did not care at all. I was going to raise my baby and I didn’t care what people think. I still get stopped in the street and I’m asked ‘Oh aren’t you that girl who had the baby at 14’. Yes, yes I am! And she’s now a happy 4 year old child.
Q2. How did you feel when you found out you were pregnant?
I was terrified. I was only 14 but from when I had my first scan, i was in love. That was my baby!
Q3. Do you feel like life has been harder because you had children at a young age?
I don’t feel like it’s been harder because I have always had help from family and friends. I still went to school, finished my exams.
Q4. Did you ever feel judged by anyone? If so, how did you deal with it?
I felt judged by everyone. Everywhere I looked when I was pregnant I felt like all eyes were on me, the 14 year old with a massive baby bump. I tried my hardest to not let that get to me.
Q5. Do you think there are any advantages to being a younger mum?
Not really, I feel that I’m exactly the same to my mum who had a baby 21 years apart from her first. She did a good job and i feel like i am doing a good job.
Q6. What are the best and worst things about being a young mum?
The best things i feel are everything, I’m raising my own baby. I feel like every other mum. I feel likes that’s the best part. The worst? I’m not sure. I think maybe finding who your real friends are is the worst part.
Q7. How do you think we can challenge the stigma that surrounds young mums?
I think there is a lot that we could try to do but in my opinion i feel that we no matter what age you are, you will always be judged. Having a baby too young, having a baby too old.
Q8. What are the main issues that young mums have to deal with, and how do you think they could be better supported?
The assumption that you must have slept around, i got that one a lot. Over the time i have seen lots of young mums who have struggled with money and housing after they got pregnant (may have been kicked out, no support etc) and the council can’t help because of age.
Q9. Do you think that the support for young mums has improved over time?
Yes, but not by much. There is still all the hate. I feel like there could still be more but in my home town there is a lot of support I received from my midwife and health visitor.
Q10. If you were approached by a young mum asking for advice, what advice would you give them and why?
Be the parent you want to be. Don’t let people change your views and beliefs. That is your baby x
If you would like to read more about Becca and her family, you can find her here.
You can also find her on Twitter, Facebook and Instagram.